Santa and the Bull

BantaSingh saw an exhausted Santa Singh running up to him.
What happened to you Santaji?"
"There was this nasty big bull in my street that nearly killed me today."
"Oh really, what happened?"
"I was just walking quietly wearing this red shirt, when the animal came charging at me like a locomotive!He almost got me!"
"So, how'd you get away?"
"Well the bull kept slipping. He slipped three times, and that gave me a chance to make it to the fence and jump over."
"That"s scary Santaji. If it'd been me, I would probably have shit all over the place."
"Oye! I DID! What do you think the bull was slipping on?"

Santa jokes

Everybody was angry with the hike in petrol prices

Santa: Sir, why are you so angry?

Sir: The petrol price is increasing day-by-day, this is not fair. Santaji, you don't look worried?

Santa: Why should i worry. For me it is the same price.

Sir: how come?

Santa: Earlier also i filled for Rs 100 now also i fill for rs 100!
Sir: ???????????

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Santa and boss
Boss : am giving u job as a driver. STARTING salary Rs.2000/-, is it o.k
Sardar : U R great sir! Starting salary is o.k.......but? ?
how much is DRIVING salary...?

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Santa to his wife: darling, years ago u had a figure like coke bottle.

Jeeto: yes darling i still do, only differnece is earlier it was 300ml now it's 1.5 ltr.

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banta: you cheated me.

shopkeeper: no, i sold a good radio to you.

banta: radio label shows made in japan but radio says this is all india radio!

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nurse: congrats santa, you are a father.

santa: don't tell my wife, i want to surprise her!

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Santa: My wife is still scared of water

Banta: how come?

Santa: yesterday when i went home, she was in the bath tub with the security guard!!

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Santa makes fool of water
Santa: today I made a fool of water?

Banta: how did you do that?

Santa: I heated some water for a bath and bathed with cold water

More Sardar jokes

Sardar's theory : Moon is more impt than Sun, coz it gives light at
night when light is needed & Sun gives light during the day when light
is not needed!!!
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2 sardars are driving a Car, one puts on the indicator and asks the
other to check whether its working, he puts his head out and says
YES...NO...YES. ..NO...YES. ..NO...
************ ********* ********* ********* ********
Sardar shouting 2 his girl friend " u said v will do register marriage
and cheated me, I was waiting 4 u yesterday whole day in the post
office....
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Sardar is in a dissection class of cockroach. He cuts its 1 leg, and says, "chal", it walks.
He cuts 2nd and 3rd legs and said, "chal" , it walks.
He cuts all the legs and said, "chal...." Finally he wrote the conclusion.. ....
....... "after all the legs of a cockroach are cut - it be comes deaf......"
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A Tamilian call up sardar and asks " tamil therima??"
Sardar got mad, angrily replied.... "Hindi tera baap!!!"
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2 sardarjis looking at Egyptian mummy.
Sar 1 : Look so many bandages, pakka lorry accident case.
Sar 2 : Aaho, lorry num be r is also written...BC 1760!!!....
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A sardar on an interview 4 da post detective.
Interviewer : who killed Gandhi?
Sardar : Thank u sir 4 giving me d job, I will start investigating. ......
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A sardar for an exam had studied only one essay 'FRIEND', but in the exam the essay which came was 'FATHER' . he replaced friend with father in the essay and it read: AM A VERY FATHERLY PERSON, I HAVE LOTS OF FATHERS, SOME OF MY FATHERS ARE MALE AND SOME ARE FEMALE. MY TRUE FATHER IS MY NEIGHBOUR.
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Interviewar: what s ur qualification?
Sardarji : Sir I am Ph.d.
Interviewar : what do u mean by Ph.d?
Sardarji : (smiling) PASSED HIGHSCHOOL with DIFFICULTY.. ..
************ ********* ********* ********* ********
Amitab : In which state Cauvery flows?
Sardar : liquid state.....
Audience clapped.. Amitab stunned, looks be hind, ALL WERE SARDARS..... ..

juss 4 fun..do not take it as personal..

GREAT SARDAR JI

An American, an Italian, a Turk and a Sardar met.

American: I'm proud of our CIA. They know whatevever's happening in the world, often before it happens.

Italian: I'm proud of our women. They're the most beautiful and proud and not easy to be "had".

Turk: I'm proud of our carpets...true works of art. No one can make carpets of such high quality.

Then they all looked at the silent Sardar, waiting for his response. They asked: What are you proud of?

Sardar: I'm proud of myself!

They all asked: Why?

Sardar: Last week I screwed an Italian woman on a Turkish carpet...

And the CIA knew nothing about it

What an Awesome answer

t was a hot meeting at the conference hall, all the people from the dept were called in, the VP was looking much tensed.

The mood was so bad my friend asked "Hey, What is this meeting about?"

I told him may be the would decide when to have another meeting and chuckled.

People though nervous smiled at each other, then the VP started talking.

He said about the recent attrition rate was so high around 10 people had put in their papers, all experienced guys. It was the quarter end and so work was huge. If we do not complete the work on time, we need to be paying heavy penalty said the VP.

The VP then turned to the manger and told "Hey take how much ever resources you want recruit or take them from other departments, but complete the work in another 25 days. Take people and complete it man."

To this the sweet manager humbly replied

"Sir! Give me one wife and nine months and I shall show you results, Don't give me nine wives and one month, I cannot do anything."�

Everyone looked at him blank!

The VP did not have anything else to say and just walked away.... What an awesome answer.

Telangana bharatam

"TELANGANA BHARATAM"
bardavajudu:- andaru vinundri arjun leka banam kotetollu gida evaru leru..

karnudu:- gatlaenduku antav saru..gida nenu lena...

bardvaja:- nuvvu evaru vai...

..karnudu:- karnuni...

. bardvaj;- a kulam vai nedi.

...karnundu:-...madi...china kulam.

. bardvaj:-..khkhkhk..china kulapodivi hahah..banam kodta antav po edkeli

duryodanudu:-em matladutunav saru...aptinunchi sustuna kulam gurinchi baga tistunav...... gida kulam potilu nadustunaya..banala potilu nadustunaya...khkhkh em saru nuvvu kulam gurinchi matladutunava..hahahha me nayna di a kulam saru..ne gunam gurinchi gida evarini telvanda... nuvvu matti kunda la puttinav nedi a kulam... gida kusuna gi shantanavudu shiva samudrudaina ganga garbam la puttaleda. ginadi a kulam.... heheheh..ega chepukunta pothe ma kutumbam motam oka kulapollam kadu.. ega salu gani sapudadaka kuso........

DAD how was i born

"DADDY! HOW WAS I BORN?" Junior asks his dad,


"Well, I saw your Mom and I first got together in a chat room on YAHOO. Then I set up a date via e-mail with your mom and we met at a cyber-cafe. We sneaked into a secluded room, where your mother agreed to a download from my hard drive. As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, but it was too late to hit the delete button."



"Six weeks later your mom sent me an instant message saying that her operating system was showing signs of unauthorized program activity from a self extracting file which had implanted itself in her BIOS."



Then nine months later a little Pop-Up appeared and said: 'You've Got Male'!